It can be difficult to honestly face up to the effect your behaviour is having on your partner and the rest of the family.
You may be feeling bad, even guilty at times about your behaviour. However not doing anything about it will only make things worse for everybody concerned.
You may also at times find yourself minimising, making excuses and pretending that things aren’t that bad.
Your behaviour is not acceptable and it is having a damaging effect on your partner and children.
Joining a MOVE programme requires a lot of hard work and being honest with yourself. Change is possible with consistent effort and you can choose to stop abusive patterns of behaviour.
Who is the programme for?
- Does the pressure I am under impact on my partner or family?
- Have I ever scared my partner or family?
- Have I been putting my partner or family down or calling them names?
- Has my partner ever said they feel controlled, threatened or scared by me?
- Am I concerned with how my behaviour is impacting on my kids or family?
threatening her, controlling who she sees, feeling jealous when she spends time away from you, making her feel bad, threatening to harm yourself in order to get your way, being silent, sulking, accusing her of seeing other men, blaming her when you act badly.
Trying to make her doubt herself, belittling her and humiliating her in public, not allowing her the space to think and decide for herself what is true. Showing disregard for her version of events and reality.
Shouting, raising your voice
Physical Abuse: pushing, hitting her, pulling her hair, slamming doors, punching walls.
withholding money, deciding how she should spend her money, checking her accounts and questioning her financial decisions and actions.
pressurising her to have sex and to do things that she does not like, spiking her drink or ensuring she is drunk to agree to having sex with you, sulking or punishing her for not having sex when you want it
Post –separation abuse:
continuing to try and control her behaviour, stalking activities, aggressive and frequent texts, phone calls, talking to your children about your partner in a very negative and abusive way, telling your children that their mother has forced you out of their life in a way that leaves them conflicted and worried about you.
Your behaviour has serious effects on your partner and also on your children’s lives. You may not be able to see how your behaviour affects your family but your (ex) partner and your children can suffer emotionally as a result of your actions.
By attending our programme, you will become more aware of the impact of your behaviour. You may continue to choose this behaviour, but you will be aware that you have other choices.